- Apr 7, 2022

But Forgiving Myself Is So Hard...

"Oops!"

All of us are familiar with this expression within the English language. It means that we made a mistake. Mistakes are natural parts of our growth can be one of the best teachers. We cannot run from making them, no matter how much we strive to control our environment.

But then, there are some mistakes that are detrimental to our goals and future success. Sometimes, in a moment of weakness, tiredness, or frustration, we do or say things that damage our reputation, family members or friendships to the point of being irreparable. It can feel like we are the worst persons on earth. It's those times when we feel like we want to run under a rock and hide so that no one sees our folly. We tell ourselves that we should have known better or done better. How could we be so stupid, silly, rash, or careless? Negative thoughts race through our minds like wild horses.

We become the judge and the sentencing jury. We are the bailiff who forcefully removes us from the courtroom and into the holding cell. Then, we are the prisoners. We place ourselves in this mental prison because of our own self-condemnation and self-criticism. The prison cell we create is because sometimes we can find it so hard to forgive ourselves. I've been there.

In moments like these, when we're drowning in sorrow and self-pity within these mental prisons, I want us to remember that we actually have the keys. God gave us the keys when He gave us His truth.

This is the word of God. One scripture has the power to pull us out of the prison in the same way that one key unlocks a door.

I remember once that the truth of 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 washed over me like the flood of light that engulfs a room when you draw back the curtains. The truth is that I do not have to pursue being perfect because God's grace is enough for me in my weaknesses. When I held on to this truth, I felt true freedom. I forgave myself.

As Christians, we are blessed. God's love for us is overwhelming. His grace is unending. His redemption is refreshing. His forgiveness is liberating.